Being a mom today is better than at any other time in history, thanks to life-enhancing inventions such as washing machines, dishwashers, breast pumps, and—most importantly—yoga pants.
I’m convinced that yoga pants must’ve been invented by a genius mom somewhere, since I’m sure yogis weren’t wearing them in India 1000 years ago. And calling this blessed invention “yoga pants” was a brilliant move to make us feel like we’re doing something healthy by wearing them. (“Post-partum pants” just doesn’t have the same ring to it, does it?)
Here are 12 reasons modern moms love to rock the yoga pants:
1. Black is everything.
Most of the time they come in black, which is always slimming and always goes with everything.
2. Ease of washing.
If your kid spits up, wipes snot, pukes, leaks a diaper, or drops sauce-laden “pasghetti” on your yoga pants, they wash easily. No dry cleaner. No ironing. Just wash and dry and go.
3. Fake it till you make it.
When you wear them, you can pretend you just did yoga, or that you’re on your way to do yoga, but you don’t actually have to do yoga (you’re a busy mom, and besides, wearing the pants accounts for at least half of the benefit of yoga, doesn’t it?).
They flatter ye ol’ derriere. If childbearing gifted you with some extra junk in your trunk, yoga pants make your butt look smaller. Perhaps it’s the no pockets thing or the lycra squeeze thing, but they miraculously shave off at least an inch.
5. Definitely photoshop.
On the other hand, if you need a little boost in the booty department, they make your butt look bigger. It doesn’t matter that this flies in the face of #4. Yoga pants make your butt look better, no matter what. It’s the law.
6. Flaunt it.
If you gain a little weight because you keep eating your kids’ unwanted pizza crusts (and because, you know, you don’t actually DO yoga), yoga pants stretch to fit. In fact, a bigger behind just makes yoga pants tighter, which proportionally makes your butt look even better. (It makes sense, I promise.)
7. Comfort is a must.
The stretchy waist is oh so comfy on your post-pregnancy, I-can-only-suck-it-in-so-far, where-did-that-dimply-skin-flap-come-from, baby belly.
They can be dressed up or down, no matter what the fashion magazines say. Flip flops with yoga pants? Check. Tennis shoes with yoga pants? Check. Boots with yoga pants? Check. Ballet flats with yoga pants? Check. And if isn’t actually fashionable? No problem. You get a Motherhood Fashion Pass. (The MFP. Let’s make this a real thing.)
9. “I have nothing to wear.”
Yoga pants save time because you don’t have to think about outfits. In fact, you don’t even have to change your bottoms at all in the morning. You can put yoga pants on before bed, wake up, throw on a bra and a cute top, and you’re good to go.
10. Bend, and snap!
They also save you time in the bathroom. We all know how challenging it is for moms to find time to go to the bathroom, much less deal with zippers and buttons once we’re in there. With yoga pants, you just yank ‘em down, do your business, and yank ‘em back up again. Just like your toddler’s Pull-ups. Easy peasy.
11. Did I mention comfort?
When it comes down to it, yoga pants are basically pajamas. Versatile, flattering, socially acceptable pajamas you can comfortably wear in public.
Dads love yoga pants, too.
[quote_center]Seriously, could there be a better time to be a mom? Viva la yoga pants![/quote_center]
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