All those months of planning and the wedding is called off. Doesn’t matter whether you and your now ex-fiance ended in good or bad terms, the hardest thing you will do now is call off your wedding. All that excitement and anticipation going down the drain. But hey, you can survive this. You WILL survive this. Here’s how to call off a wedding with class (and no drama) but most importantly, make it out alive.
Return the ring.
There’s a lot of “returning the ring etiquette” out there. But for the sake of simplicity, as soon as you and your ex-fiance have confirmed that you’re calling off the wedding, start off by returning the ring. Doesn’t matter who is calling it off, it’s just best you return it unless your ex-fiance insists that you keep it. But honestly, do you want to keep a ring that will forever remind you of this day? Maybe, depends on how things end. But hey, if you want to keep it that’s up to you. The only situation where you would be obligated by law to return it is if the ring was a family heirloom.
Sit down with your former fiance and talk it out.
And by talking it out, I don’t mean “let’s make up” talk. The next couple steps you two are going to take are going to be difficult ones, so it’s important that before you part ways for good, that you both figure out a plan on how to deal with the repercussions of your decision. Grab your guest list and divide it by your family and friends. Decide who is going to contact who. Same goes for all the wedding vendors you’ve contacted to help plan the wedding. If you are both too emotionally distressed by the situation, ask your parents and closest friends to help you spread the word that the wedding is off.
Call your closest family, friends and bridal party.
Now comes the hard part. Breaking the news to everyone. As a general rule of thumb, no social media please. Sure, it’s quick and efficient, but doesn’t scream classy. Inform your guests with the courtesy they deserve, not a shocking Facebook status. Now depending on how soon you call it off before the actual wedding date with determine how you go about telling everyone. And remember, you’re just breaking the news. Don’t feel obligated to provide an explanation.
- Calling it off two months or more before wedding date: Luckily for you, you have time on your side to help you deal with the situation. Call your closest family, friends and all members of the bridal party. If you can, tell them in person. To everyone else, mail out a cancellation announcement informing them of the situation and apologizing for any inconvenience.
- Calling it off with less than two months before the wedding: When time is of the essence, it’s best to just call up everyone on the guest list. If it’s a lengthy list, get your parents, siblings or closest friends to help you out. Remember, no need for explanations.
- If you’re having a destination wedding: Call everyone immediately so they don’t book their flight or accommodation or so they can cancel any plans they’ve made.
Contact all the wedding vendors.
Contact all the vendors that were involved in helping prepare your wedding. This includes florists, caterers, performers, photographers, etc… This also includes any travel arrangements for destination weddings or the honeymoon. Contact them as soon as possible to cancel the services and possibly get some of your money back.
Return all wedding gifts.
It’s customary to return all gifts if the wedding is canceled, especially those that were given to you at your bachelorette party or bridal shower. It’s rude to keep gifts that were given to you for a wedding that’s never going to happen.
So tell us:
Did you or someone you know have to call off their wedding? How was it handled?
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