Consider This Before a Threesome

Original Photo Modified from: health.ninemsn.com.au
Original Photo Modified from: health.ninemsn.com.au

To threesome or not to threesome? That is the big question.

Sexual exploration and experimentation with your partner, or just in general, is something to rejoice in and celebrate. Of course, sexuality is complicated and so are relationships- especially when it’s not just the two of you involved. Of course, we’re talking about the threesome debate. Do threesomes spark the passion back into your relationship or does it tear it apart?

So your boyfriend or husband casually notes that he would want to try a threesome- and, you’ve actually considered it once or twice yourself. Now you guys are seriously thinking about doing it. Or perhaps, on the flip side, your best friend and her husband have decided on doing a threesome and have asked you to be their guest star. You’re considering whether to join in on it or not. Before you decide, there are some things to consider, we think. 

threesome feet
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There are two very distinct perspectives and things to consider within each, when it comes to this threesome debate:

What role are you playing in your threesome?


jealous women
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The Committed Perspective

You’re the wife or girlfriend in the relationship and you guys are thinking of bringing a third party (another woman) into the sexual playground.

Things You Need to Consider:

  • what is your relationship dynamic right now? are you and your partner having issues with commitment or trust? If so, a threesome could aggravate the dynamic.
  • are you the jealous type? some people get more jealous than others. The reality is that sometimes we all have insecurities- it’s not a bad thing, emotions are natural. If you are the jealous type, doing a threesome could make your insecurities even worse.
  • who is the woman you’re inviting into the threesome? if it’s your best friend or an acquaintance, think about your relationship with them. Do you trust them? Are they vindictive? Do they get attached? Women are inclined to feel something when having sex, so keep the other person’s feelings and personality in mind when picking that guest star.

Threesome
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The Single Girl Perspective

You are a single girl and enjoy sexual exploration. [Listen, before you pass judgment, we’re not saying that single girls are “sluts” or harlots- but sex is something that can be a fun experience. It doesn’t mean you are going around town painting the town with a different sexual partner every day (we are a proponent for safe sex, after all)] You’ve been asked to join in on a threesome with another couple.

Things You Need to Consider:

  • who is asking you to be their guest star? is this your best friend, a coworkers, merely an acquaintance? What is your relationship with this couple? Will it affect any of your daily routines or commitments? Is it worth it? Make sure you know the price of your involvement. As well, it’s good to know the health of the people involved in the threesome. Neither of them are your sexual partner and you don’t know what goes on in their sex lives.
  • do you get easily attached after having sex? the man in the threesome is, undoubtably, in a relationship. They are engaging in this threesome for a thrill- but he (and she) is off the market. If you’re going to get attached by being sexually involved, rethink participating. You don’t want to be stuck in a love triangle.
  •  are you comfortable? this is a big one. You are entering into a scenario of preexisting lovers. They know each other’s bodies, likes, dislikes, etc. You’re the new girl. It may be a little nerve racking at first (as most sexual encounters can be), sure- but feeling comfortable is a big factor. It can make or break the fun of the threesome, which is, of course, why you’re there- to have fun!

Those are our thoughts on threesomes- some of us having tried and experienced it and others who haven’t. All in all, every situation will be different because everyone is different. The best thing to keep in mind is to know yourself and the situation well before entering into a threesome scene. After all, you wouldn’t want to be cast in a C List film.

Tell Us:

Have you ever experienced a threesome? How was it and what can you share with others on the fence of engaging in one?

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1 COMMENT

  1. I’ve been part of an ongoing threesome arrangement in which all three of us are very happy and satisfied. There’s an underlying friendship that goes deeper than just sex. We all fully participate and are gratified by the arrangement, and we share something of which others only dream.

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